You have eyes—can’t you see. Then Jesus placed his hands over the man’s eyes again. As the man stared intently, his sight was completely restored, and he could see everything clearly. Mark 8:18, 25
I am loathe to confess my faults to anyone but God. Yet, sometimes when I learn a truly hard lesson, my insight may be able to help you in your relationships. So here goes! My son Matt came to visit this week, and in the course of our conversation, told me of an important letter he had to write. I quickly jumped in with, “I could help you with that.” He said he would handle it. Not to be shut up, I told him I could help with grammar and perhaps even suggest some impressive vocabulary. Frustrated, he looked at me and said, “Mom, I am glad my ego is okay; you are making me feel inadequate to the task.” Yikes! My intention was to help. The outcome of my faulty vision was hurtful.
Let me explain. There is an exercise in psychology in which each participant is given a large white sheet of paper with a small black dot in the center. After each person is given adequate time to examine the paper, they are asked to reveal what they saw. Every person shared about the black dot with a failure to notice the vast expanse of white. The leader went on to explain that the white area could be filled with poetry, art, even music lyrics or profound quotes, yet all eyes were focused dot. We are often like that. Our loved ones are filled with wonderful qualities, but we focus on the one flaw. We are blind to their possibilities; we see limitations. Fortunately for me, Matt and I have a very open and loving relationship, and with a word of apology from me, we were able to have a lovely afternoon together. How do you view others? Where is your focus—on their flaws? Too often, the answer is yes. Learn from my mistake. Others need your approval and love.